Sunday, July 15, 2012

Try a Little Kindness

It amazes me the way some married couples fall into a mean relationship. That is, finding fault with each other. Harping on small things that irritate. Constant "put downs". Plain discourtesy and outright anger & blame if things don't go according to plan.

The modern name for this is verbal abuse. Sad, sad, sad for a couple who promised to love and cherish each other. So where did it all go wrong for them?

Like anything else it begins with the little things and escalates. In some cases it becomes a cold war. In others it's a case of an outright battle which turns things even uglier.

It often begins when nobody remembers to say"sorry". A successful marriage is truly one where there are two good forgivers. A little kindness and understanding goes a l-o-n-g way. And it has to start with one partner even if the knock-backs continue. How can you stay mad at someone who doesn't retaliate? And it's a fact that if one feels guilt about someway they've wronged the other, they give their partner a rough time to try and drag them down to the same level.

God has been left completely out of this relationship. It's time for one or both to realize this and turn to Him to change things for the better. And as each grow closer to God, it's like the sides of a triangle, they grow closer to each other. As the Bible counsels us..."Be kind and tenderhearted to one another."


Margaret said...

So true, Rita. Just one little non-kind word or action can be the beginning of a drawn out cold war, just like the tongue can kindle a huge forest fire :) A very timely warning for all of us to bring EVERY thought into the captivity of Christ.

Dale Harcombe said...

Very true Rita. Yet sadly the way many couples operate, ofetn making snide comments about their partner in and out of their hearing to others. Not a good recipe for a happy marriage.

Dorothy Adamek said...

'A successful marriage is truly one where there are two good forgivers.'

Wonderful reminder. Thanks, Rita.

Have a wonderful weekend.
Dotti :)